Thursday, May 19, 2005

Spring Cleaning

In going through cabinets and closets today, clearing out the debris that collects somehow, I came across the kiddos baby albums and photos of their fist year. First, I can't believe the crud I kept (not the baby albums. Just all the other junk I unearthed). Second, I am proud that all of the seven kids have a baby book and a photo album. I was just putting the finishing touches on the baby's album, as she turns one tomorrow. The process of clearing out junk and seeing some of those photos transported me back in time. Some generalizations that can be made upon reflection are as follows (WARNING: This is as close to free assiciation writing as I get). I am actually not as tired as I was 10 years ago, but I have less energy. I have a more difficult time recovering from the birth of a girl that a boy. I smiled more when I was younger. I have only gone up one size in 11 years. Not bad, eh? The adreneline is wearing off from the first few crazy years of our marriage, and now we are struggling with stability. We have moved every 4 years, and we are now on year 5 here. I could have stayed in house number one forever (although it would be too small for us now), but dh likes constant change (I call it upheaval, but then that's just me). Homeschooling is taking up most of my free time. That, and blogging. I am much better at taking care of babies now than I used to be. I have a much clearer idea of who I want to be when I grow up than I did 10 years ago. I guess I am close to being grown up? I think the age of reason should be 40 years old. And finally, I am a lot happier than I thought, alot more sure of myself than I thought, and much more clear on who I am than I used to be. Who knew? I never would have realized this without unearthing all the garbage I kept for what reason I don't know. I am wiser now, and it is all going out of here tomorrow. Woo-hoo, it feels good to shed a few old layers, and let the new one breathe. Amen.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I enjoyed that one, Renee! Thanks! That's the kind of thinking I do occasionally too.

May 19, 2005  
Blogger Unknown said...

That's what spring cleaning is for! Good one. :)

May 20, 2005  
Blogger Adinah said...

a most excellant and insightful post!! I loved it!

May 20, 2005  
Blogger Adinah said...

sorry Rene,, but I had to tag ya, you have to list 10 things you have never done and then tag three people. And then pray they'll still be speaking to ya!

May 21, 2005  
Blogger Julie said...

I like this post a lot! It reminded me a conversation I had with my brother recently. I am going on 32 years. My brother is approximately 15 years older than me. He asked if I feel differently since having my 2.5-year old son. I mentioned to him that I don't feel as mature as I thought I would after having a kid. He said he never feels as mature as he thought he would and he is pushing 50. I am in my 30s, married, and am working on my second kid, but somehow I don't feel as old and wise as I thought I would be. Strange how that works.

May 23, 2005  
Blogger Renee said...

Julie - I think the realization of the wisdom you have aquired sneaks up on you. I can spend a month feeling like a pathetic weakling, then come across some reminder of myself at a previous time and BANG! I realize how much progress I have made. Usually, I think wisdom is difficult to define, and sometimes only makes itself known in the absense of foolishness.

May 23, 2005  

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