I don't know what to write anymore. I was looking back at some of my old posts, I just don't have what ever it was that I had back then in me right now. My kids still say cute things. I still go to church and get regular and wonderful bursts of spiritual joy. I am still doing iconography, just haven't posted any photos in a while. It seems as if all my joys as well as trials are finding refuge in the privacy of my heart, with no ability to be revealed in words.
I still contemplate the world, and my place in it. I just can not form words about it.
My life right now seems so complicated. I have teen girls that need constant direction and encouragement. I have a son, a high school son, away at school who still needs me and I have to figure out how to tend to him from a distance. My husband is, like so many others, struggling to provide security for our family. He needs encouragement and support. My other children are all at pivotal points in their learning and need constant reinforcement to keep progressing. My extended families are going through many transitions and trials. I am pregnant (?!?!!!?) and feel as if I am trying to hold the entire world together, with spit and duct tape.
I have contemplated just shutting this blog down, but I really don't want to. It is shrinking exponentially. I have been dropped from many blog rolls, my daily readership has halved in the past few months. Many of the old time friends have either moved, closed up, or cut way back.
And yet, I love this place. For some reason, I can't be fully open right now with the realities of my life. But I still love the connections I have made, look forward to any comments, and love surfing around checking up on everyone.
Even amid the complications, there is a lovely simplicity to my life. Daily work, daily love, daily creating. I guess for now, that will have to do!
Blessings to you all (few?) who visit here today!