Friday, March 31, 2006

An interesting comment

I received this comment yesterday about Our Lady of the Sign icon that I recently wrote. I am highlighting it here, along with my response, because I realize how I neglected to adequately explain this icon. I am sorry if it caused anyone else confusion or concern!

gina said... was "He" who is more spacious than the heavens. it was "He" who contains what the universe cannot contain..
it is "He" who bathes the sky with His beauty.
it is "He" whom we should pray to.
it was "He" who sent His only begotten Son Jesus, to die for our sins. God bless...

Mary Poppins NOT said...

I am sorry if I didn't explain this well enough, gina.

The reason "She who is more spacious that the heavens" is used, is simply to indicate that the body of Mary contained the Creator of the Universe, who cannot be contained. This implies the majesty and humility, love and mercy of God, not any power of Mary's. She held the unholdable because He willed it. She merely said, "Be it done to me according to Thy word."

This is really an icon of the Incarnation of Christ. Her hand are in that position "Orans" which means praying. Christ's hands are in a blessing position. This is an important distinction, because Mary doesn't Bless, she prays to God just like us. Only Christ Blesses.

Thanks for stopping by, gina.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

The Canon of St. Andrew of Crete

Today, being the fifth week of lent, our church worshipped by chanting and praying Matins for Thursday in the Fifth week of the Great Fast or The Great Canon of St. Andrew of Crete.

The Great Canon is a long penitential poem that takes pieces from the Scriptures, both Old and New Testaments, and presents them as either examples of repentance to be followed, or examples of folly to be avoided. After each of the troparia, or stanzas, the cantors and congregation sing "Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me!" and make a full prostraton.

This was a truly remarkable experience. Humbling, cleansing, clarifying. The service lasted about 4 hours. And we did approximately 220 full prostrations. Suddenly, I knew without a doubt how feeble I am. How weak, steeped in imperfection, and utterly deceptive I am. And how merciful, healing, and loving our Good God is.

Oh, I am sore and tired. My legs feel like jelly, and I forsee great stiffness in the morning. But it was so worth it! My soul is calm, I feel self possesed, in other words, I have more self knowledge than I did yesterday.

Here is a portion of the Canon that really jumped out to me.

"The ladder that the Patriarch Jacob once contemplated is the ascetical effort, the mystical ascent. Oh my soul, if you wish to understand these two, renew yourself and be made new."

"Have mercy on me, O God, Have mercy on me."

"To gain his two wives, the Patriarch endured the heat of day and freezing of night, in labor and combat, cunningly increasing his flock day by day."

"Have mercy on me, O God, Have mercy on me."

"The two wives are action and contemplation; Leah is action, because she had many children; Rachel is knowledge, which is gained only with toil; and we gain the fruit of both of these only with struggle."

"Have mercy on me, O God, Have mercy on me."

"Be watchful, O my soul, and strive as did Jacob, so that you may not only be filled with action, but that you may also gain knowledge and the vision of God, and radiant contemplation, that pearl of great price."

"Have mercy on me, O God, Have mercy on me."

So, do you think it against the spirit of a penitential act to pop a few Advil before I go to bed???

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

One of the most amazing dates of the year

Wonderful day yesterday. In an odd twist of fate, I gave birth twice on the same day, four years apart. So I am now the proud mother of a 10 year old and a 6 year old.

I took the older kiddos to their P.E. class yesterday, and the little kiddos to the store. While checking out after getting groceries, the newly 6 year old told the cashier, "Today is my birthday AND my sister's birthday. I was born on her fourth birthday so I was basically her birthday present."

As usual on the kiddos birthday, I mentally go through the actual Birth day, and remember the thrill of meeting them for the first time. I remember those moments so clearly, clearly enough to bet I won't ever forget. This year, my daughter and I celebrated the exact moment she turned 10 by hugging and watching the clock. For two entire minutes, one before and one after the moment, we embraced and she excitedly looked to her "double digits" and to the future, and I tenderly looked back to the first moment I laid eyes on her. Isn't that so much a part of motherhood, watching your children look forward with eager anticipation, while the sweet and tender moments of their childhood and infancy pull our thoughts backward? I think that is just one more talent of parents, looking forward and backward at exactly the same time.

To my lovely "middle" daughters, I love you, I am grateful for you, and I have been so blessed to have you share my life. I anticipate watching you grow into the women God has made you to be with great joy. Happy 6th and 10th birthdays, girls!

Monday, March 27, 2006


Okay, so today has been a house day (as opposed to a school day, or yard day). Schooling has been uninspired, but done none-the-less. I have done a mountain of laundry, and delivered the piles to each proper bedroom. I have eaten 3 meals already (it's only 2:30 pm), and still feel hungry (?), and have had almost an entire pot of coffee. I have walked outside and made a mental plan of attack for carving civilization out of the wilds of nature out there, with me and my imaginary landscaping crew. Um, that means me and a few children. So, I actually am looking forward to putting order outside, and am considereing dropping in lots of perennials and scattering seeds and moving tons of mulch left over from last years tree removal.

Here's the way I look at it. I would like to join a gym and get in shape. Can't afford it, don't know where the time would come from.

I would like to hire landscapers. Can't afford it.

So, I will get a work out for free, landscaping my yard myself, for free. Makes sense, eh?

Today, I got all the mental work done. And now I wait for warmer weather. And a lot more energy. And a few more muscles.

First thing I (we) have to do is a spring stick pick up. With three acres of woods, nature's pruning has been effectively completed, and now we must collect and dispose of all these sticks and branches. I will take the larger ones and add to the fence I am making. Basically I am piling up in a zig zag pattern, any long, thick stick, to separate a wild area from a planting area. It sort of keeps the blackberries out, and makes the leaves pile up around the outside of the fence and kill the grass and weeds that otherwise would need weed-wacking.

The little sticks will go on the burn pile.

Then I have to either rake out my planting areas or burn them. It always depends on the weather, the wind, and my abilities.

Then I have to decide what to do with all the muddy areas we have this year, since we took out all our old bushes last year. If I don't get something on that dirt, the weeds will overtake the whole are in no time.

Also, there are many sinking spots in our back yard after the addition was done. So, I need a load of dirt delivered, and I guess I will be hauling and shoveling dirt.

Once all this is done, I need to decide how to edge my new planting areas, go to my mom's and split up many of her perennials and put them around all my blank spots. I have a visions of a fence, yard decore, wind chimes and hanging plants. That's like the frosting on a cake I'll be baking all year, I think. Next year hopefully, I'll decorate.

Anyway, here I am, dreaming of spring weather, and getting in shape. *sigh*. Can't wait!

Thursday, March 23, 2006

An anthology of conundrums

Oh, how I want to be able to post something profound, witty, timeless and of course, grammatically correct. I can't think of any one thing. I have a swirl of things in my head, and can not seem to settle on any of them long enough to make a real post topic. So, I guess, this will be an anthology of sorts. At any rate, maybe by putting them here, I can get them out of my head, so I can get some sleep.

This year, I will, in the span of 2 weeks, have a teen ager and turn 40. Double whammy. It's not that I mind being 40, as a matter of fact I am grateful, given the alternative. It's just that it seems like such a short time ago I was just in my early thirties, and something about the early thiries is very comforting. No more uncertainty of the twenties. My life is on a set path, more or less. And I have so much more time until I have to even THINK about being older. For some reason, the 40's, while I am sure they have their own gifts to give, make me look back more than I ever have. The continual desire to go back, and re-mother my first 3 children is almost painful. As I mother the next four through babyhood, toddlerhood and childhood, I am so much better at it now. But I can not; there are no do-overs. So now I have a near teen, and don't know how to do this either. Will I look back in my 50's, as I parent my younger children through their teens, and wish I could re-do my eldest's? Could I possibly be more intentional in my parenting with him now than I was when he was small? So many of his first 5 years were spent with me either sick and tired during 4 other pregnancies or sick and tired from post partum fogginess. I was in survival mode so much of his little years, and it makes me sad. But having larger spaces between my children would mean not having the children I have, and that is unacceptable. As much as I try to be calmer, more attentive, less critical with him, I still find myself responding to his needs and personality like I always have - in a state of reaction rather than proaction. My youngest will soon be 2. At her age, my oldest already had a sibling and I was expecting another. I marvel at the different mothers these two children have - the different families they are growing up in, really the different world's they inhabit. I only have maybe 5 more years with my oldest son, if that, and I want it to count. I don't want to want a do-over in 10 years, as he finishes his teens.

That leads me to the other swirling thought. My baby is almost two. Never have I had an almost two year old and not either had a new baby or been gigantically pregnant. I can honestly say, I am most pleased with this situation, and yet realize my fertile years are not endless; will I regret in the future not being more "proactive" in taking advantage of the last bit of my fertility? The thought of being pregnant and trying to manage my life as it is is FRIGHTENING, and yet, the thought of the child-bearing years being over is startling. I acknowledge that whether or not more children are in our future isn't entirely in my hands, but you don't monitor your fertility for 13 years without having some idea of what is going on. And this is a good thing, but puts a little more control in my hands than was there 10 years ago. So what to do with it? *sigh*. There aren't any easy answers for this...

Then there is the schooling issue. My oldest is doing well homeschooling academically, but I fear not so well in self discipline, competiveness and responsibility. I have checked out all the schools around here, and while one is mostly acceptable, the down sides are significant enough to give me pause. A fellow parent and I were brain storming and came up with the idea of a co-op for the upper junior high children in our families. Actually, there are 3 or 4 families that could use such an arrangement, and that would mean 10-12 kids. The parents are all a pretty talented bunch, and with the addition of our wonderful math, Latin, and chemistry tutor (another very talented person) and access to daily Liturgy, and such, this has given me a glimmer of excitement. I would so love to teach anatomy, as that is my specialty. I would also love to assist another talented parent in Literature and Composition, as it is a true love of mine. I would still like to be involved in my older children's educations, but feel a need to expand their horizons for their sakes. Please pray for our situation, that this inspiration was God sent, and that He will assist us in this endeavor.

Okay, while there are a few more swirlies, I think I will try to leave it at this for now, and continue a different day.

Thankyou all, by the way, for your comments on my icon. I would like to go through and explain the symbolism and theology behing the icon, when I have time. Maybe once I get these swirlies settled down, I'll be able to focus a little better.

Blessing to you all, and rest assured of my daily prayers for all my blog buddies, known and unknown!

Monday, March 20, 2006

Here She is! Finished, named, varnished and blessed!

This represents approximately 60 hours of work. If I do this at home, it takes months. At the workshop, about 2 weeks. Today I am laying low, feeling sick and exhausted. Hopefully just exhausted.

She who is more spacious than the heavens. She who contained what the universe cannot contain, pray for us!

Saturday, March 18, 2006

What a couple of weeks THIS has been!!

This has been a busy, productive, exhausting, exhilerating, and interesting last two weeks.

I am off to the icon workshop today to varnish my finally finished icon. I will post a photo of it when I get back. Then tomorrow it will be blessed.

During this workshop I was balancing the normal work of running the home, teaching the kids, hosting two successive house guests (who where also taking the icon workshop), having a weekend thrift-store shopping spree (My entire spring wardrobe for $35. Can't beat that!) with my sister-in-law, and so on.

My first grade son is making terrific progress in reading, after a slow start. I just had to spend more time with him every day. Every day. Even weekends. One day off and he back-slides. God gifted us with a free offer of tutoring by a 9th grade neighbor in need of service hours. What a gift. One hour a week really helps. So, he is doing well.

My three year old son is FINALLY POOPING ON THE POTTY!! He is my sixth child, and you would think I would have this potty training thing down. But he was a hard egg to crack. But, one day, out of the blue, he just did it. And he is so proud. He tells anyone who gives him even 2 seconds of their time. For instance, at church a lady there says, "Hi sweetie, how are you". He replies, "I pooped on the potty." You get the idea.

Most my laundry is washed, dried, folded, sorted, but still sitting around in piles. If I don't get is put away today, somehow it will all end up back in the wash by Tuesday.

Lenten meal preparation has been going along. Lots of fruit and veggies and legumes. And soy milk. And trail mix. We are trying to emphasis fasting as a gift of love, not a strict law. My kids tend to get really legalistic, and I want the SPIRIT to soak in, not just the rules.

My "Mrs. Happy" committments have slipped somewhat. By Monday I should get back on track, as nothing else disruptive should be going on (yeah, right).

7th grade son just finished his report on Archimedes. He did a really good job on it. One of my favorite quotes is this, "Slaves were the second class heroes of science." He was explaining why the Ancient Greeks had so much time to learn and discuss, discover and explain. The slaves did most of the work. I thought my son's explaination was so poetic. But then I am a little biased.

The older 2 girls were so much help!!! They kept up with school, worked with the little kids, baked muffins, made lunch, and kept up with the laundry. I was so Impressed. The older three kids had a lot of responsibility this past couple weeks, and they really rose to the occasion!!

The little two girls seemed to miss me the most diuring all my comings and goings. But they almost always climbed into bed with me in the morning, and we had some nice quiet time together. There isn't anything better than giving a one year old a smooch and having her whisper in a sleepy voice. "Thankyou, mommy."

So, that's the wrap up. I met some very interesting people at the workshop. I hope to go into more detail later, but for now, Off to varnish!!

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

My brother

I am so proud of him, about to complete a hard won goal. Bravo!

Monday, March 13, 2006

Penultimate post on the icon progress

So here is Our Lady of the Sign, almost finished. I still have some cleaning up to do, Jesus' halo, and the lettering.

Alexa commented on this being called "writing" an icon. Icons are more than religious pictures. These are on the level of the Gospels. They teach the faith, and it is as if I am copying the bible. So it's called "writing". The patterns are passed down from generation to generation, and are not allowed to be changed without the bishop's approval so that it can be made sure no theological truth has been changed, left out or confused. I wish I could go into this more now, but am still trying to catch up around here, and shouldn't spend more time on the computer. I will try to explain this more later. Thanks to you all for your encouraging comments. This is a difficult and tiring project, very worthwhile, but quite challenging. I appreciate your enthusiasm. Blessings!
(agian, click on the photos for a closer look)

Friday, March 10, 2006

Continuing Progress on Our Lady

Here is the latest. Tonight I should be able to do the hands and gold leaf, and finish the faces. Then tomorrow the lettering, and Sunday the varnishing. We will see. (click on photos for a better look).

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

More Icon Progress

So this is what I have accomplished in the last two days. As you can see, progress slows considerably. This is also because I had to redo many details, as I wasn't happy with them the first time. So, today I will be working on her outer robes, baby Jesus' robes. Then I will do the faces. At the end I will gold leaf the entire back ground. Usually I only gold leaf the halos, but this time I decided to go all out. Then, I will paint on the halo lines and the lettering on the gold leaf.

All this will hopefully be finished by the middle of next week. I have to get going, to do school with the kids, plan dinner, do a load or two of laundry, feed the kiddos breakfast, and then get the big kids set on their dayly work. Then, I can go work on my icon. Dh will be coming and going all day to keep things in line here while I am painting.

We have Presanctified Liturgy tonight, as well. I will explain that at a later time, but in the Eastern church, duing the week in Lent, we have a liturgy similar to the one in the West on Good Friday - no consecration, but we receive communion from the consecreation from Divine Liturgy on Sunday. I'll get more into it later. Now, back to work.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Umm, about those Oscars...

...who won?

Monday, March 06, 2006

Icon Progress so far

In the begining, there was nothing. Then the background colors were added in. This was my first day of the workshop. I am doing Our Lady of the Sign - she who is more spacious than the heavens. He whom the universe could not contain, she held in her womb. It is the official icon of Advent, and often used for Pro-life causes. It is one of my favorites.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

Adam and Eve

Commentor:Where was Adam?? Golfing, that's what men do, or maybe fishing...... Eve had to eat the was all part of the plan.......

MPN: ooo, Ayekah, so Eve didn't have free will? Did Satan? I'm moving this to a post!

Commentor: Well.......that's a long debated topic, as you well know. Did she have free will prior to the deed? Or did the deed incite free will?
It's akin to the chicken or the egg thing. If I had to call it, I would have to say yes, she did have free will prior to the act. I think the serpent also played his part freely though, somewhere (non theologically) I think the serpent was part of the "plan". What I mean to say is that I do not think he insinuated himself into the Garden, he was placed there. Oh boy.....what a can of worms this is.....

Commentor: Allowing myself to throw further fuel on the flame, Eve does have a "discussion" with the serpent over the eating.....Adam simply takes the fruit and eats it.......:)

Carry on, people, and when I am well, I will add my $.02. Blessings!
UPDATE: I am recovered, praise God.

Here is my question. Is it possible that God the Son would have incarnated, not as our saviour, but still to participate in the unity with His creation, even if the fall hadn't happened. In other words, was it really necessary for sin to have happened for Jesus to become incarnate. Could He have worked it out that we would still have the benefit of having Him share our humanity without having the huge separation caused by the fall? Isn't it His greatest desire for unity with his creations, bound in love for all eternity? Couldn't it all have worked our without the fall?

I have been poisoned

A week into the fast, and while eating Thai food with clams, I was poisoned. After a long night (and I will mecifully spare you the details), I am slowly sipping tea and sleeping, and grateful to be alive. I swear it feels like death is approaching - sheesh, one bad crab, and I fall like a sissy.

Anyway, there are some great discussions brewing over original sin and free will and the problem of evil. I will move some from my com box up here, and add some more comments, then over at Sapientiae Amator , there is a discussion of the problem of evil. Good stuff!

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Housekeeping details

Some more Housekeeping. I added another new link. Square Zero is a new blog, its owner Eric is a friend of our family (along with his wife and seven children), an Eastern Rite Catholic, and a Theology of the Body teacher. He is also very well read and well spoken and you should enjoy his reflections. Head on over!

I also have added a few more prayers on the side bar. I will be changing them out from time to time, and adding Lenten reflections. I change my "What is making my happy today" box almost daily, unless the same thing is still making me happy.

So, please keep your eyes on the sidebar - there's lots of good stuff over there.

One more thing. Down 3 or 4 posts is a poem my 7th grade son wrote. I would love to share your thought on it with him. It's long, but it would be much appreciated.

As you can tell, I have spent too much time on the computer today. Will be off line now til tomorrow's cup of coffee.


P.S. I also added The Little Wretches. I have been so edified by this group of ladies supporting each other in their faith journey, and in virtue. Such a breath of fresh air!

And Another Meme

Sapientiae Amator tagged me also, so here goes:

Seven things to do before I die:

Have some of my art work show up in a ridiculously priced galary.
Write an icon that could be used in my Church.
Have at least one more baby.
Lose the accumulated baby weight by being vibrantly alive.
Cook for the sheer joy of it.
Take unplanned road trips with my husband.
Make daily prayer a normal part of my life, like breathing.

Seven things I cannot do:

Write neatly
Keep a white shirt white
Catch up on my laundry
Finish something I began without getting sidetracked at least once
Play the piano well
Understand Spalding's the Reading Road to Writing

Seven things that attract me to my other half:

His sense of humor
His sincere desire to be a Godly man
His awesome hands
His ability to converse long into the night
His generosity
His desire to do great things for God
His desire for and acceptance of all our children, born, and yet to come.

Seven things I say:

There you go
Where's my _____?
Hurry up, we're going to be late!
It's possible, pig, it's conceivable you miserable, vomitous mass.
If I have to say it again, you are not going to be happy!
Am I the only one who ever picks anything up around here?
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, (except for all the other sunshines that live here).

Seven books I love:

The Scarlet Letter - Nathaniel Hawthorne
The Scarlet Pimpernel - Baroness Orsca
The Stand (the original version, not the unedited version) - Stephen King
Active Birth - Janet Balaskas
Gift from the Sea - Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Ina May's Guide to Childbirth - Ina May Gaskin
Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte

Seven movies I love:
O Brother Where Art Thou
The Princess Bride
The Fellowship of the Ring
A Man for All Seasons
Quiz Show
The Velveteen Rabbit (Meryl Streep and George Winston)
Babette's Feast

Seven people to meme:

Oh, heavens, seven? How about 3, I'll say Ayekah, Hector, and Elena.

Interesting Meme

I was tagged by Ayekah to do this meme.

1: Black and White or Color; how do you prefer your movies?
Color, as long as they were filmed in color. I don't like colorized black and whites.

2: What is the one single subject that bores you to near-death?
Conspiracy theory/black helicopter type talk

3: MP3s, CDs, Tapes or Records: what is your favorite medium for prerecorded music?
CD's but I am really disappointed with the quality. I have tapes from high school that still work, and CDs I bought last year that skip.
4: You are handed one first class trip plane ticket to anywhere in the world and ten million dollars cash. All of this is yours provided that you leave and not tell anyone where you are going … Ever. This includes family, friends, everyone. Would you take the money and ticket and run?
No way, never, no how.

5: Seriously, what do you consider the world’s most pressing issue now?
Lack of genuine love between people.

6: How would you rectify the world’s most pressing issue?
I am trying, one child at a time.

7: You are given the chance to go back and change one thing in your life; what would that be?
I would have tried harder to excel at my talents, not just try to get by.

8: You are given the chance to go back and change one event in world history, what would that be?
Adam and Eve would reject Satan in the Garden.

9: A night at the opera, or a night at the Grand Ole’ Opry –Which do you choose?
Grand Ole' Opry, especially if Allison Krause were there.

10: What is the one great unsolved crime of all time you’d like to solve?
What was Adam doing in the garden when he was supposed to be protecting Eve?

11: One famous author can come to dinner with you. Who would that be, and what would you serve for the meal?
Stephen King --- Grilled T-bone's with girlled onions and mushrooms, garlic mashed potatoes, spring mix salad, a good shiraz and pineaple upside down cake.

12: You discover that John Lennon was right, that there is no hell below us, and above us there is only sky -- what’s the first immoral thing you might do to celebrate this fact?
I would blow my head off, because after all, what's the point then?

I tag Mama, Alexa, and right back atcha,Sapientiae Amator

A Poem, written by my 7th grade son. Want to give him a grade?

An Ode to Technology

Once upon a time, in a village far away,
There lived a man who had a very bad day.

For, you see, he nearly brought judgment day quite close,
Which was not on his routine (and he also singed his nose).

This is how it happened, I will tell you very soon;
It all started one day when he was Googling the moon.

“A full moon comes once a month. It’s often very pretty.
It showers things with light,” it said, “In the county and the city.”

Now, this all seems quite normal (except that it rhymes),
for a computer to be saying, but it was quite different this time.

For the words were not on the screen, as I assume you suspected,
but from a mouth, which appeared, and was most unexpected.

There it was, floating in the center of the screen,
with teeth that were extremely white and sparkling clean.

Its tongue looked so perfect, so healthy, germless red,
and gums that were un-swollen, and pink as a flamingo’s head.

At first the man had thought it was a pop-up add for mouthwash,
but when he realized what it really was, he said, “Oh my gosh!”

For it was a warning sign that could mean only one thing.
He had brought all technology to life by making the computer sing.

Apparently he had entered an extremely long code,
by pushing all the right buttons, with the P.C. on the right mode.

He knew all this because the mouth had begun a speech
that got the man more worried than James of the Giant Peach.

“The chances of the Code being broken are quite slim,
and you, you’ve just done it. You’ve brought technology to life, Jim.”

“What, how’d you know my name?” asked Jim. “The code knows all.
And now, thanks to you, the universe will fall!”

And then something happened, something very strange;
The mouse that he was holding bit him at short range.

The speaker (not the mouth) sent a sonic field projection,
Which blew him back ten feet, quite to his objection.

His automatic printer started pelting him with paper,
and the air humidifier started emitting water vapor.

Then the lamp above him shined so bright,
the entire house was filled with piercing light.

Jim was temporarily blinded, he stumbled all around,
and was blown back suddenly by the speakers’ awful sound.

He fell back and tripped on his mini vacuum cleaner,
which was sucking items up, and growing all the meaner.

The sink started drenching him mercilessly with water,
then the T.V. flashed bright colors and the furnace became hotter.

Jim began to sweat, he couldn’t stand the heat;
he ran outside the door, and his car he chanced to meet.

The window wipers began to make rude hand remarks;
the headlights glared at him and the exhaust pipes shot out sparks.

The engine started up and the car did something mean.
It charged at poor old Jim, and hit him in the spleen!

Jim was sent flying for the third time that day,
he landed in the garage in a state of disarray.

Then it was the electric door’s turn to be mean;
it had the cruelness of heart to turn into a guillotine!

Everything seemed to go in slow motion for Jim.
He saw the door coming down, heading straight for him.

He move his head just in time, he was nearly beheaded.
There was now a long, deep crater, for which the door is credited.

Then Jim heard a sound, coming from the yard.
He looked out the door and felt like a retard.

He had just fallen for a very simple trap,
as there was a robot next to him. It raised it’s arm and WHAP!

Jim was woken up by an ear-splitting scream,
with a pain in his head and an ache in his spleen.

He got up and saw that he was in New York,
and by the looks of things, the Big Apple was stuck with forks.

Huge towering robots made from every electrical item
were tearing New York apart; cars blew up behind him.

Buildings collapsed and monuments fell. Jim was very gruff;
he shouted at the top of his lungs, “As if this city hasn’t had enough?”

He became furious at himself for causing such destruction,
and began to think up a plan, ignoring explosion eruptions.

Suddenly, and idea popped into his head.
He went in search of nature’s iron and lead.

When he had found his abundance, he was very glad.
He started up a fire, and put in all he had.

The metal melted together, which was exactly what he needed,
he molded it into a robot suit and hoped not to be mistreated.

He let it cool, then put it on, and reviewed his battle stations;
and tried to act as if the robots and he had strong relations.

He went back to the broken up city, made the sign of the Cross,
walked stiffly to a robot and said, “I need to see the boss.”

The robot picked him up, put it’s arm back, and threw Jim;
he groaned and felt queasy. This flying was getting to him.

As he soared through the air, he wished he would stop.
But he sort of changed his mind when he landed on a cop.

The cop shouted suddenly, Jim was quite afraid.
He expected the cop to chase him, but on the ground he stayed.

Jim realized what happened, he put on an innocent face,
and whistled to himself. He was such a disgrace.

Then he remembered why he was there,
to destroy the robots’ leader and win fair and square.

He wondered were it was, he looked all around,
and when he looked under a bush, there it was found.

Jim was so terrified, he couldn’t even speak.
He could merely open his mouth and create some sort of squeak.

For it was the computer, with its clean, evil tongue;
and its all-knowing smile. Jim felt like dung.

The mouth let out a cruel, high pitched laugh,
which was interrupted by a loud, metal crash.

For Jim had brought his iron fist straight down.
And the computer laid there, crumpled without a single sound.

But then it seemed as if Jim’s efforts were in vain,
because the computer flew back together, completely un-slain.

Jim whacked his forehead, which caused a lot of friction.
Jim clenched his fists and shouted, “Stupid Fantasy Fiction!”

But then Jim noticed something; the mouth’s, er, mouth was moving.
But there was no evil, quaking voice, which was quite soothing.

Then, quite to his horror, he was lifted off the ground,
and was gliding swiftly but smoothly, without making a sound.

He passed over the cop, who got off the street
and walked around backwards with shuffling feet.

He passed through New York and saw something very weird.
The building flew together and the robots, which Jim feared,

Were all moving backwards, sucking cars into their hands,
and setting them down gently, unharmed, on the land.

Jim then left New York and floated over the nation
to his California home, which was on probation.

The windows all were smashed and everything was broken,
but it all was all slowly fixing. The mouth that had spoken

that horrible speech was on that screen and moving silently.
And all those electrical items that had treated him so violently

Were moving around backwards un-breaking things here and there. Until the mouth disappeared and Jim sank into his chair.

He took a deep breath, enjoying the peaceful air,
and in a satisfied voice said, “Fair and square.”