Thursday, September 29, 2005

See ya!

My family and I are taking a week off of life, and going away for a little camping. The house is torn up, and everything is dusty, disorganized, and in disarray (I mean more than the usual amount of dust, disorganization, and disarray). **Of course in a home addition, this means progress, so I am not complaining.** Our schedules have us scattered, so we want to regroup. We will make Christmas ornaments, play board games, read books, and and I am bringing paper, scissors, glue sticks and markers, and the littlies can create to their hearts' content.

Until I return, I thought I would leave you all with something I read during my retreat this weekend (Every Woman's Journey, given by Katrina Zeno).

The Plan of the Master Weaver

Our lives are but fine weavings
That God and we prepare,
Each life becomes a fabric planned
And fashioned in His care.
We may not always see just how
The weavings inter-twine,
But we must trust the Master's hand
And follow his design.
For He can view the pattern
Upon the upper side,
While we must look from underneath
And trust in Him to guide...
Sometimes a strand of sorrow
Is added to His plan,
And though it's difficult for us,
We still must understand
That it's He who fills the shuttle,
It's He who knows what's best,
So we must weave in patience
And leave to Him the rest...
Not til the loom is silent
And the shuttle ceases to fly
Shall God unroll the canvas
And explain the reason why--
The dark threads are as needed
in the Weaver's skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Dropping like Flies?

Is it just my computer, or have Ayekah (The Soul Sings)and Alex's (Domestic Excellence) blogs disappeared? I was just listening to Alex's music this morning, and set aside her latest post to finish in my afternoon break. I went back, and ... gone.

Same with Ayekah. Went for my thought for the week, and looking forward to the Friday pick-me-up, and .... gone.

If either of you ladies read this, please say "hi". I would hate to have you be... gone!

A Gift

Stopping by to check in and say hello. I have been trying to read everyone's blogs, usually 1/2 of my sidebar a day. I haven't had time to comment much, which I regret, because I like to keep the conversation going.

Blogging is quite odd, really. I have loved getting to know the people I have conversed with via blogs, and am glad I have had this experience. But on the other hand, it is quite unsettling to have a regular commenter stop commenting, someone I would call a "friend". Are they just busy, or are they moving on to other, more exciting blogs? After leaving an in depth comment, that gets no reply, does that mean they didn't like it, or they just had nothing to add? The blog conversation is unlike any other I have had. I guess I don't know the rules, if there are any. If someone stops commenting, what does it mean? (I don't have a counter or anything. I only know if someone visits if they leave a comment). If I want to address them directly, is it appropriate to do so over my blog, or in a comment on an unrelated post on their blog? If someone who encourages me stops commenting, am I wearing them out, do they think I don't need it anymore, or have they moved on to share the love with other bloggers?

Bottom line, I am not sure I need this extra anxiety in my life. I have to decide if the value of having this nice community at my fingertips is worth more than the self doubt and insecurity that it has dredged up in me.

Maybe I will just make this blog a place to put out there my thoughts and ideas, for what ever they are worth, and any comment is just frosting on the cake?

Anyway, I went to a retreat this weekend, "Every Woman's Journey" given by Katrina Zeno. Very good. We had to dig deep to answer some spiritual questions, and all that scraping off bottom of my soul left me in a rather disrupted state for a few days. But I feel better now, much more whole, and ready to make a sincere gift of myself to the world.

I think that is how I will approach blogging, as a gift, without worrying what I get back in the way of comments. Take if for what is, then, stuff I hope you will find enjoyable, worthwhile, helpful. Blessings to you all, then, my friends.

P.S. Akeyah - I couln't find you. Please don't leave without saying goodbye!

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Interview with Rosie-Posie Sandybanks

Rosie-Posie is our 5 yodd. She is the fifth child and our 3rd daughter. She currently shares a room with all her sisters, but will be moving to a new room with her baby sister after the addition is finished.

1.If you could be the same age as one of your siblings (12, 10, 9, 7, 3 or 1) which age would you want to be and why?
I want to be 7 years old, because I just do. And because I want to do choir, P.E., and piano lessons.

2. What is your favorite thing about visiting Grammy and Papa? I like having cake for dessert after my dinner. And I like the way they make their dinners.

3.Are you helpful to your mommy when it comes to taking care of your little brother and sister? Sometimes, yeah. I change diapers, and do what you say whenever you say to watch the baby or change Nicky into clothes.

4.What do you like to draw? I like to draw balloons or tree or animals or pictures, or books, or apples, or doggies, or cats, or babies, or persons. I like to draw hearts, and you (me, MPN), and the ABC's.

5. What is Heaven like? Like when God is on the Cross and it's really big. and God's the boss and tells us what to do. I would want to go to heaven to be more alive. I would like the way God bees nice to us in heaven. I picture heaven pretty and I like it.

6. What is your favorite part of the day? When I do my math and my school, and when I went to Great Flags Six America.

7. What is your favorite color? Red. I like the way it's clean.

8. What is your favorite thing to play with? My plastic tea set.

9. Who is your favorite made-up person?
I think it might be Esther from the Veggie Tale.

10. What is your favorite food? Hmmm, oranges.

11. What will you be doing when you are grown up?
Feeding my baby.

For my newer readers, I have been interviewing my children with the help of my blog friends. The initial post is here.

The previous interviews are with 12yods, 10yodd, 9yodd, and 7yods.

I only have the 3 year old ds left. I don't think it would be productive to interview the 1yodd, but then, who knows?

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

This is how computer illiterate I am

I just finally figured out how to get the St. Blogs Parish code in the correct place. All this time it has been hiding out in my very first post. Now it has it's rightful place on my sidebar. Yea for me!

Another addition to the sidebar

I just added Mama Heffalump to my sidebar, under the name Messages from Mama. Please give her a warm welcome!

Monday, September 19, 2005

Good Monday, everyone!

God is a good, merciful, loving Father, and has put people in my path these last few days to soothe and calm my spirit, cleanse my soul, and bandage my wounds.

As we continue our school year, I need to be strict with the routines I have set up. The only way I will be able to do this is with God's grace, and much perseverance. Consequently, I will be blogging less frequently, although I may toss a reflection or funny out as time allows. I don't think I have that many readers anyway, but those of you who do visit and comment, I thank you, I appreciate you, and I hope you will stay tuned.

I will leave you today with another part of the Divine Liturgy, called the Litany of Peace, as well as the Prayer to the Most Holy Trinity that the children and I say every mortning. Blessings to you all!

Prayer to the Holy Trinity

O Most Holy Trinity, have mercy on us.
Lord, cleanse us of our sins.
Master, pardon our transgressions.
Holy One, vist us, and heal our infirmities,
for your own Name's sake.
Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

" 'Wrath and anger are hateful things, yet the sinner hugs them tight.'

"That's indisputable, isn't it? Wrath and anger are hateful, and the sinner does hug them tight. (And yes, granted, your wrath and anger are perfectly justified, as are mine, but here we're speaking of sinners.)"

I just came across this little gem, and it pierced my heart. That's me. He is describing me. To a T. I am angry. Angry at what? At who? Everything, everyone. I get angry at the dog when she has to eat, or go out (always at inconvenient times), at the kids when they make too much noise, spill, leave a mess, need to have instructions repeated. I get angry at dh for being manipulative, distant, self absorbed, too clingy, demanding, uninvolved. I get angry at the baby for crying, needing me, poking me while she nurses, screaming. At anyone who intrurrupts me when I finally get a chance to write, read, or rest. I get angry at the vacuum cleaner, for clogging yet again. At my computer for not working properly. Okay, you get the idea.

How do I respond in anger? Sometimes a sharp word, and ugly look, and maybe a cabinet shut extra hard. Most of it stays inside, and is eating me up into a hollow, decaying person. Not that the people in my home can't tell I am angry. I am sure the family knows I am angry. They just don't know why, and knowing kids, they blame themselves.

What is it? Why am I angry? I have a great life, and yet I am utterly frustrated. I frequently feel I have no control over these emotions. "The sinful man shall be subject to them."

Reading further into this insightful post, I realize that I used to just have quick flashes of anger, and then *poof*, they would be gone. Now I am clinging, hugging, petting, nuturing, waiting for the next inevitable excuse to let it rip. This he describes as ill-tempered and sullen. EEEEWWWWW. I do not want to be described that way, and yet, I know it is accurate. I never realized until today that I did this. I have been trying to tell when is anger justified, and when isn't it in order to give myself any excuse for sin. I guess I should work under the assumption that it just isn't, and go from there.

Well, guess it's off to confession today. I want to let the author of this at Disputations to know how he parted the clouds for me today, and I can now put a word to the emotion. The clarity is delightful, and I thank you for taking the time to write this today.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

True, so true

"JPII very wisely said that the nature of original sin was to destroy our perception of the truth that God is Father. When that happens, we don't stop believing in God. We simply start relating to him as Master instead. Europe's long slow spiritual suicide (and our struggle to imitate it) bear eloquent witness to this basic spiritual principle, a fact experienced again and again in the history of OT Israel."

I read this over at
Catholic and Enjoying It and couldn't agree more. While this is a fairly simple idea, it is rich, and explains so very much about some of my own spiritual failings.

Good Morning

A gift to you all this morning. May your day be filled with grace and peace.

Blessings to you all, on this the Feast of the Exultation of the Holy Cross!

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

martha marmot, where are you?

I tried to add you to the blog roll, but your profile didn't take me to you so I CAN'T FIND YOU. If you are still there, let me know, 'kay??

Compendium of ideas

Well, the first two days of school have gone well. It is interesting to have 5 children to homeschool now. There is a 7th grader, and 5th grader, a 4th grader, a 1st grader, and a Kindergartener. Then a 3 year old pre-schooler, and an active 16 month old. We have begun choir, homeschool P.E., tutoring, and piano lessons. I have the week's menu ready, including snacks. I have the schedules typed. We have a before bed routine, and a earlier morning rise time. So, this sounds very ambitious, but so far, by the end of day 2, all is well.

Big news - for the past 3 days, my feet have hardly hurt at all. For the last 16 months, they have hurt every day, so I hope this ability to move and get more done is going to last.

The addition is progressing well, and we begin the dreaded remodeling inside next week. Except for having our master bath torn out, there hasn't been any interruption to our current home. By next week, our hallway will get demolished and a new hallway put it. Dust and noise, but hopefully just for a week.

Oh, remember the baby mice we saved? Well, this last week, smack in the middle of 90 degree Indian Summer, some persistant mouse has chewed through our thermostat wires 3 days in a row. This kills the A/C, and requires a visit from a professional. Also, the mouse I am trying to kill in my silverware drawer just cleans out the trap, leaves a few droppings, and goes his merry way. No good deed goes unpunished, I tell you.

All the big kids are at choir tonight, along with dh, so the little ones are going to bed at 7:00 pm; I should have 90 minutes of quiet to grade papers and maybe have a cup of coffee and a biscotti. Maybe do a little laundry and listen to the radio with out interruption. Maybe I'll wash the Kitchen Floor, while I listen to some of my favorite music. We'll see.

Last night I went to a lecture on iconography. The iconographer had a showing of her works, as well as a presentation on the history of icons. It was truly lovely and inspirational. I can't wait for our addition to be done, so I will have a place to work on my icons. I have two in the works now, but find it challenging to fing the time to get out all the supplies, get a significant amount of work done, then put it all away. In my new room, I'll get to keep it at the ready, and paint whenever I have a chunk of time.

This lady's name is Solrunn Nes, and she is from Norway. Her perspective of the iconoclast period is quite stunning, as well as the embrace of sacred images since then. I wish I could do more justice to her, her work, and her lecture, but right now I don't have the time to reflect, nor the quiet to think; for now I just want express my joy at being able to hear her lecture and see her icons.

Peace, out. (Any ND fans out there?)

Friday, September 09, 2005

Sharing the love

I want to share this beautiful post with you all. This is a blog of someone quite dear to me, and reading this just made this long, frustrating day totally worth it.

Here is a teaser

"When I was very young, maybe 4 or 5, I was wandering around in the yard and came across a perfect picture of beauty. I stopped in mid-waddle mesmerized by the bright orange glow of marigolds clustered together at my feet. What I was doing in the flower bed I don’t know, but I remember looking at those flowers and thinking they were the prettiest things I had seen all day, or ever. That’s the way it is when you’re just a little person, all day is all there is. I remember reaching down to touch this beauty in front of me. My little fingers, which at the time seemed of sufficient size, were hesitant. I was unsure what to expect when I came into contact with the glowing surface. Would it be hot? Would it be sharp? Will it hurt? But it is so beautiful and inviting!?! How could something so pretty hurt? I had to take the chance,..." Please, please go and read the rest here.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

archives visited

I was browsing through some of my old posts, and came across this one that fits perfectly with my thoughts and feelings about Hurricane Katrina and all the suffering taking place now. Hope you think it relevant, as well.

Death defying falls and rapid curves can be FUN!

Hello everyone, that is if anyone still visits me after a week off. I have been busily preparing for our school year to begin on Monday, and then had a few fun days off. Sunday we went to a terrific party at my brother and sister-in-law's farm. We spent the night there, with the kiddos and dad camping out, and the babies and I in the house. Today, we had our annual "Home School Day" at Six Flags. What fun! My mom watched the two little ones, and the rest of us, including dh, and my two brothers and their families all attended. I rode many, many roller coasters and whirly rides. I haven't ridden so much since I was a teen, because I usually have the babies with us. Today I was stroller and diaper bag free, and I took full advantage. I found that riding roller coasters has improved with age and experience. The more I relaxed and just let the coaster lead, the more fun I had. When tense, I experienced much more fear and physical discomfort. The kicker was one particular roller coaster that had us riding BACKWARDS. You could not see what was coming, and just before the plunge, a surge of excitement was the only clue of what was about to happen. This reminded me once again of my life. I never can see what is coming, but usually have a surge of excitement before some big turn of events is about to occur. If I relaxed, it was fun. If I was tense, it hurt. Once again, Dear Lord, help me remember this lesson. Amen.